By Alex Culpepper/Correspondent
Dayton, Ohio (AP)— An all out assault on the crushing boredom was the order of the day. An onslaught of weariness and apathy had sought to shackle the “Bad Girls” with its own insidious brand of terror. Four Ohio women, known by many as the “Bad Girls,” were the victims of a sudden attack of ennui. With little to defend themselves and even less time to react, they sought diversion and solace from whatever they could muster.
“It really came from nowhere,” said Jessica Gibson-James, spokesperson for the Bad Girls. “I mean, I guess I wasn’t paying attention. But I’m not sure why this would happen to us—so I just ate some candy and looked for someone to kick.” She replied.
Fellow Bad Girl Katie Baumgardner said that she was angry. “How dare this happen to me! This is so . . . so ‘un.’ This world is going to (expletive)! Anyway, I put on some lip gloss and sent some emails. Then I made a list of my favorite colors.”
Officials on the scene were unable to give many details. Witnesses were scarce, and the incident is under investigation.
Another Bad Girl, Caitlin Closser, spoke candidly. “I don’t know. I guess I’ll just practice counting to 20 again. I’m getting better, I really am.”
No one knows for sure what will happen next, but one thing is certain for Bad Girl Linda Turk, “It makes me realize that wearing great shoes doesn’t always solve my problems.”
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